Hello my Dearest mother :)
Thank you soooo much for the packages and letters!! I loved it all!! Thank you sooo much!! Sam's story about finding which girl to ask is hilarious hahaha :) But thank you for the jerkey and chex mix and protein bars! They are sooo great! And thank you for the music. For some reason it isn't playing but I am working on fixing it today :) Thank you for being the best momma ever!!! I love you!
I have learned a lot about Cap Moroni. he talks a lot about how we need to be the ones to act to see the blessings of God in our lives. Besides faith isn't just things that we think can happen but literally it is an action that we take believing that God will do His part. Moroni didn't just pray and then sit back to Watch God run the show; He dove into action, preparing, fighting, and doing literally ALL he can to see the miracles happen. And when it didn't work out and he lost, he didn't blame God, but looked to the people to make sure that thy were righteous. He understood God's personality-that God WOULD and WANTS to deliver all who believe in Him from any difficult situation in their life. And when He didn't, it must have been something that was lacking on his part or on his people's part. And, what's interesting is that I do work my hardest but I am realizing that sometime during my life I made it a truth that I will work my hardest and it still won't work out.. And that is not faith either. So I am going to expect miracles. I am going to believe in myself more because GOD believes in me. he gives us challenges because he trusts us. And apparently He sees a lot more in me than I see, so apparently I need to get some better contact lenses because He sees a different picture.
I don't know why but it seems like ever since I left the MTC, that the spirit wasn't there as much. And Satan went all out. And yesterday in Church the lesson was on 3 Ne 11 and it talked about how the Savior invited them all to bear witness of who He was and I just closed my eyes and envisioned it as if I was there. And the spirit flooded over me and I just felt so at peace with everything that I believe in and was doing. And what was so interesting was that immediately after, I felt something else happen. I felt something else whisper to me, trying to get me to focus on all the problems and failures I had had on my mission so far and if there was a God, He would never let that happen to me while I was on HIS mission.. And it was really interesting the difference and how quickly the adversary tried to quench my incredible experience that I had just had with the spirit. And I decided to fight. I cast him out of my thoughts in my heart, and I had to choose what side I would belong. We must have opposition in all things SO WE CAN CHOOSE!! What's interesting is how quickly Cap Moroni puts dissenters to death. HE DOESN'T LET ANYONE OR ANYTHING GET IN THE WAY OF HIS VICTORY. And I am Learning how to do that in my own life. Sometimes I would let the thoughts of discouragement and worthlessness sit and make a difference in my mind instead of executing them the minute they present themselves. And after I fought I had more spiritual experiences and was filled with more peace and learned more. Heavenly Father has seen fit to have me swim in deep water this mission and I am so glad that He is. It is making me strong. It is the fastest way for me to grow and He needs to me grow as fast as possible. These people are waiting for this message and I will be ready to be the one to present it. Heavenly Father NEVER sends in thoughts of doubt or fear. Never. So I am not going to let them hang out and cause pity parties :) Dat ain't helpin nobody!
For p-day today, Elder Meng and I decided to go to the park and throw the Frisbee :) It was sooo much fun! We got to go in sweats and t-shirts and let le say.. MAN IT FEELS GREAT!! haha i have missed it! We have been jogging to all our destinations today to get some extra exercise that we miss :)
This week was intense. We had 3 exchanges! I hardly ever saw Elder Meng haha! One of the exchanges we did was with the zone leaders and it was incredible. The Zone leaders are in Angers and so I stayed in nantes wit one of them and Elder Meng went with the other there. And we went contacting and followed the spirit to where we needed to go. And the spirit was directing us away from where most of the people seemed to be, but we followed it anyways and we found some amazing people! We contacted a women, by talking to her about eternal families and she told us that her dad had died when she was little and she had a lot of questions about him and had a dream where her dad came to her and introduced himself to her so she could know who he was. In the dream she asked him how she would know if it was true or not and her dad told her to tell her mom certain things and her mom would respond a certain way and that way she would know that the dream was true. And the girl did what her dad had said and sure enough he was right. And so she told us that she knew that our spirits lived after and she wanted to know more. We taught her about the temple and how she could sealed to her family and she instantly wanted to go! It was incredible! Heavenly Father is preparing the way :)